i laid there
hidden in the covers
feeling the cold just out of reach
it was all i could do
to snuggle in close to you
your arm
your big wonderful arm
pulled me even closer
as you whispered in my ear
what did i do to deserve someone like you
i feel the cold
nuzzle it’s way in
ice building up on my windshield
my hands frozen in the air
sliding uncontrollably
into the unknown
blades ripping against my flesh
i am paralyzed by my own will
buried in a drift
making water with my every breath
melting it’s essence
into every hole in my body
my heart stops for moments at a time
skipping always every other beat
my eyes wander
looking for salvation
or understanding
or maybe just common sense
sliding uncontrollably into nothing i can stop
i stand facing the wind
everything i know hides in me
as i try to catch my breath
i use to know what it meant
but i’ve found myself
rubbed raw from the asphalt
that drags itself across my skin
the pain has disappeared
or i have become accustom to it
so i feel it like water dripping from a faucet
numbing the senses i had once been so aware of
if i fall i won’t know
whatever injuries i sustain
will just be the subtle reminder
that i am still alive
i stand at the bottom of a slope
to my left is an open space of dirt
to my right is a large pine
towering over my head
a sturdy branch extents
parallel with the ground
and on it a rope tied to a tire
i look passed that through the ivy
to a carport with 2 cars
and a walk way guarded by cats
around to the driveway
where i am riding my bike in circles
pretending to be a movie star